maybe not

i fell in love two days ago
twenty times in the span
of three and a half hours
each time while bent at the
knees, staring into wide eyes
and open face still softened
by childhood’s tender touch

maybe it’s too soon to say love?
after all, i hardly know them
but i know that i want to
see them again and maybe
assist them as they write
their stories out, the ones
that are still rough first drafts
on their way to becoming
fine tales of bravery and heroism
and kindness, so much kindness

screening

i don’t blame her
for being wary

thirty little ones
under my care
and i’d have
some questions too

she’s not looking for
a flashy magician with
no understanding
of commitment

children that age
need simple stability
in the classroom
not a disappearing act

i don’t have any tricks
except maybe with a pen
some lined paper
a few small words

and an uncanny knack
for being on time

searching

i looked for you in toul sleng
the first time i went back “home”

of course you weren’t there
amongst the photos in glass
on boards and along the wall

there was no reason to expect
that you would be, except for
the lack of witnesses at the end

i thought i would find my father’s
familial eyes staring from a face
i’d never seen, but would know

but gave up only a few boards in
when it felt like every face held
some slightly familiar feature

i walked up one aisle and down
the next in heartbreak and anger
and longing and gratitude and guilt

three weeks of travel and i’d seen
how kroursah gathered together
so many, alike and unlike

even though i could not find you
i found you just the same

new ink samples

she says i need to stop
with the 0 or 10
all or nothing
black or white
type of thinking

that i should start
exploring the in-between
pick another number
accept fractions
embrace other hues

i’ll never be comfortable
with arbitrary scales
and might take a while
to appreciate some
but i’m definitely enjoying
writing in color